Phil Revell


As a staff we are going to accentuate the positive, and this isn’t just about the children. No, we’re going to focus on what we do well, giving praise where it’s due and letting colleagues know that we value their strengths. We all agreed to get rid of the blame culture at the PD day. All except Ms Jones, but then she is a miserable cow. It was planned to begin at today's morning briefing. The Head was going to pick out a piece of best practice he’d seen the previous day, but he rushed in and interrupted Ms Robson.

“We’ve been chosen for the action zone celebration day,” he beamed.

“It will mean a VIP visit,” he continued, oblivious to the wave of apathy washing around his feet. “Possibly a member of the royal family.”

And it did. We were treated to a succession of planning visits by functionaries, whose knowledge of what happens in a school decreased in direct proportion to their job title and salary.

“Do we have to have the children here?” said one suit, as a group of kids rampaged down the corridor.

“Well, it is a school,” said his colleague.

There was huge competition to present the posy; first in the staffroom, then amongst the parents. Ms Robson’s group won the honour and Lulabelle was going to be the lucky girl until it was realised that this would involve having her mother in school. Dylan is deeply insulted because someone, probably Ms Robson, has suggested that no-one would be too upset if he decided not to come to school on the day.

All went well in the end. Amber did a good job with the curtsey and Ms Robson was on tele for 5 seconds. The Royal didn’t use the specially prepared loo, which was a bit of a disappointment for the caretaker, but he did eat one of Ms Jones’ vol-au-vents.

“That was a nice touch,” said the Head at briefing the next day. “And we thought you were a republican.”

“I am,” said Ms Jones, looking cheerful for once in her life. “Dylan and I made them the day before.”

© 2011 Phil Revell